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Talking about Hidden Subtleties Only A Friend Knows

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Hidden Subtleties Only A Friend Knows

I guess friends are more considerate than we take them for credit. They're warmly considerate, positively enthusiastic and coolly tolerable to our silly antics. They accept our wack and truer ones, even defend them from non-committal acquaintances or nasty gossip...

I wanted to reply to this, because friendship is something I take alot of interest in. I find there are several different kinds of friends. There are the good friends, as described in Alyce's post(The first part), and those are the kinds of friends that one would actually call a real friend. But there are other kinds of friends. I won't go into too much detail, but in my opinion, there are the friends who'll actually help you, the ones who'll admit to not being brave enough to stand up to you, but support you anyway, the ones who'll think the relationship with you is expendible, and thus, not try so hard to keep it, and finally, the ones who say they'll help you, but in the end, don't do anything of the sort.

I think friendship is something vital to human survival. Without it, I don't think a person is really a person. If someone isn't appreciated by anyone, even if they're happy enough with themselves, are they actually truly there? That question leads me onto something else, which actually I didn't intend to write about, but oh well, I will anyway. of confusing, and I'm not very good at explaining it, but hopefully if you just bear with me, you might get the jist of it.

Everything is connected. For example, a family. The son of a father is the grandson of his father's father, and the great grandson of his grandfather's father, so on, so forth. At some point in one of their life times, they will have met someone of another family, and then perhaps later on, never met eachother again, but there's still a connection. I'm connected to everyone on this planet, through either a close tie, or a very distant one, like a distant cousin or old ancestor knowing one of that person's family. I suppose this is connected to friendship. Anyway, basically, what I'm saying is, in the end, everyone is everyone's friend, and therefore.. actually, it's impossible to have someone completely isolated. So yes, if there was someone who no one knew of ever, they wouldn't exist. Interesting. It's like the 'tree falls in a forest but there's no one there to hear it, does it make a sound?'

Hmm... about how friends can drift apart, I think there are many ways that can happen. If one of the two becomes ore important, or surpasses the other beyond the difference between them that already existed, it is true that they may start to dislike eachother more. One side would feel inferior, while the other feel superior, whereas in the first place, even if one side was superior, they'd be used to it and they'd've based their friendship on that difference, or despite of it. Other than that, a friendship can be broken simply with a word, or a broken promise. That isn't so much drifting, but in the end, it has the same effect. Another reason for the loss of a friendship is this: When a lesser person starts admiring a greater person, or perhaps, the other way around for some strange reason, they try to be like them. Once they've become what they wanted to be, they start seeing flaws in it, and start to not like it so much, and thus, stop liking the person they admired..


I value friendship a lot as I was born as an only child. It could be very lonely when there's nobody to turn to when you feel that your parents don't understan you a bit; there's just no instant comfort, unless I immediately sms my friends and hope they reply soon.

There was a time when my parents argued and their friends (another couple) came to be 'a third person' or sort of like 'marriage consultants' and I could hear my mom crying; I was in my bedroom. Do you know that I can hear every word even with the door closed?

I was so upset and unhappy that I've thought of crawling out the window and walk to my friends' house. I was thinking: 'That'll teach them to argue next time'. But I'm glad I didn't. I wanted to, but I decided to wait and eavesdrop some more. In some ways, I also feel responsible for my parents arguing. I'm willing to be a scapegoat, a convenient blame just so that they won't blame each other.

There was a time when my dad got really mad and yelled at my mom. She elft very early in the morning the next day. Both me and my dad thought she was in serious depression when her boss called in and said that my mom was not at work. I thought she'd done something stupid (like comitting suicide) or just taking the day off to shop or something. I was so scared, so very frightened. I never want to feel that emotion again: it's as if I'm going through a possible grievience over the loss of a loved one.

I cannot say I truly comprehend such pain, but I have experienced for a bit what it could feel like. Think of the parents of their missing children: the pain is so much worse; you want to beleve your child is still alive somewhere and yet the possibilities are slim. And yet, the future is unpredictable. They don't know for certain. It felt like a blow when I thought my mother was missing, but fortunately, she called in to work a few hours late.

The bus was delayed.

And through it all, to all the adults that I've called: please don't tell my mother what I... my dad and I had went through that few hours. I don't want to ever relieve it again.

Also, I appreciate the support I'd received from the adults: You're not my friend friend, but you guys are no longer just an acquaintance, you've become someone important, someone that I'm considering repaying when I've grown up and earn my share of wealth.

:'-)